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Love is about giving not possessing

Love is about giving not possessing

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Every day in the newspapers we read about killings and violence related to people’ romantic lives; parents-children, boyfriends-girlfriends, husbands-wives and so on. It is especially the male-female relationship that is marked by a growing risk of violence. It would appear people no longer know how to stay together and when abandoned, one of the two parties involved is often incapable of accepting the new reality and overreacts with unprecedented and unsuspected violence.

Romantic relationships often end up in drama and violence and women are the ones mostly affected. Sometimes the opposite happens, and men are the victims, but it’ s usually the man who is abandoned and watches his loved one run away that ends up going mad and overreacting.

How many young girls are being threatened, how many months spent under the mere threat “If I see you with someone else I’ ll kill you”, how many ambushes and how much stalking? How many moral blackmails? And I’ m talking about an hidden world which often doesn’ t even surface amongst one’s closest friends. How many stories are later told, after years and years of silence?

Human relationships, instead of being shaped by meeting, discovery, amazement, open-mindedness are shaped by possession. The partner becomes a right, he belongs to me, he is mine, an object of mine. The relationship becomes the choice of a beautiful, lovable, pleasing product which satisfies my needs, therefore is mine! When I find out that this is not so, that my partner is free and nothing ties him up to me except his free choice -and this can only take place within a context of love and freedom- I end up going crazy…

There is a deep psychological weakness in today’s society. People often cannot bear to be turned down and can’t face a difficulty, a risk, an uncertainty. Apparently healthy people end up committing insane acts...We don’t realize how many people are in psychological need because they are not treated in their heart and spirit.

The Lord wants us to take care of such weak people; those who look possessed and shattered into several different confused personalities are brothers who need to be set free; by doing this we would also protect many other innocent lives, who haven’ t been able to understand in time in what sort of mess they were putting themselves into…

 

don Fully


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